I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
just looked in the mirror, I fell asleep with a face mask on. At least drunk me cares that much about the condition of my skin
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
Here's a rundown of my night alone. Danced my ass off in the kitchen to FleetmacWood. Drank a little bit. Ordered $40 worth of Chinese food once the drinks kicked in. Picked up said Chinese in dirty sweatpants and slippers. #livinglife
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