So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
He had one of those small greek statue penises
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
The kids I taught this morning even knew i was drunk. One of them even said, and I quote, "You smell like my dad after he goes bowling."
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
Having him as a wingman is like telling the girl you already have aids
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
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