She said she didn't have time to shave "there"
Then she shouldn't have had time to order the lobster.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
University has ruined us all. I just had to clarify the last time I had sex as "No, not at the party we crawled home from in the snow. It was the one where you puked off the balcony and hit the barbecue."
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
Do you know who changed all my phone contacts into characters from Harry Potter?
He Who Must Not Be Named.
Fuck you.
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
Randomize
