I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
FYI don't ever, ever get a lap dance from a stripper who says " she's having a bad day " at a bachelor party.
My family just legit passed around a fifth of Maker's Mark. Also, this is sort of a Thanksgiving tradition. Also, Maker's Mark is really good.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
I watched my wife kick balloons while wearing thigh highs. It's not a sentence you get to use too often
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