my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your texting shows a blood alcohol level of .12
they had to hand cuff you because you wouldn't stop trying to unzip the paramedic's pants...this is why i love you
I wish on days I started my period Chipotle would come to my house with a burrito bar ... Then give me a chocolate cake and a large beer.
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
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