come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
i can't believe you were mixing vodka with green tea last night and enjoying it.
i should bottle and sell it. my slogan could be "green tea vodka. antioxidating while intoxiacting. your liver will thank you. "
The bouncer was kicking me out and I put up my finger for him to wait while I chugged the rest of my drink..all he could say is "are you serious right now?"
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
The neighbor just poured gasoline on his 2 brush fires and proceeded to shoot Roman candles at them 🤔
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