Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
I think they took out their livers years ago and replaced them with like cheese graters or something. Only explanation.
When theres a zombie apocalypse, i will be the only fat survivor. I ate chef boyardi ravioli with part of a pen for a fork
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
Randomize