In retrospect, pretending to punch a 9 year old girl in the face was a terrible analogy to use in a piano lesson.
So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
they need to invent a card that reads "thanks for all those boners you gave me that you did NOTHING about"
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
sober me needs to have more faith in drunk me.
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
I’m sorry my lady boner messed up your mojo!!
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