he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
She broke up with me after I spent the whole day speaking in nothing but Marshawn Lynch quotes.
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
I learned a valuable lesson about combining day drinking with malt liquor: you may think you have super powers, but that's just the Steel Reserve talking.
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
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