Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
I thought he wouldn't talk to me again. You know, what's that saying "why buy the cow when you can fuck it six hours after meeting"
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
Randomize
