I just told my parents that Capt'n Crunch does weird things to my mouth... my dad just stared at me
why did they invent bidet's? your butt gets clean when your poop falls in the toilet and splashes up anyway...
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
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i crunched every chip from the dorito bag and poured it in the vase. never again will i have to deal with cool ranch fingers.
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
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My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
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