i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
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Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
By cross-referencing our messages & her Twitter feed, I've deduced that she was eating spaghetti the whole time we were sexting.
I just watched this dude try to convince this girl to go home with him. She was like, That's cute, you're cute.and she just walked away. Man I'm so not drunk enough to be around this level of sad.
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In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
I spent the entire party sexting people's significant others for them because they were too drunk to do it themselves. I did quite well too. I should start a business
This is the third time this year I've whored myself for a Netflix login. If this guy changes his password, I'm gonna fucking give up.
Or maybe pay for Netflix?
I'm not that desperate yet.
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
I dropped my slice of pineapple on the kitchen floor and was just staring at it about to cry. It was really good pineapple.
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