I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
they just named my boobs. Lefty is "Guenevere" and Righty is "I claim this boob for America"
I just pull a splinter from the head of my penis. It was a rough night.
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
Idk man I'm just a giant talking marshmallow ready to be toasted and dipped in chocolate
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
You drunkenly said something along the lines of "move forever" to the lady standing in your way. Needless to say you had too many mimosas at breakfast.
Can we just talk about the fact that the last time I got laid I was wearing a Jurassic Park tshirt?
So congratulations, your penis has now sent me to urgent care not once, but twice!
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
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