In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift.
Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking.
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
he told me "apparently my gag reflex doesn't work so if you magically grew a penis I would deep throat you"
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
Bahahaha I just turned on the fan in front of the elliptical to avoid puking//try to get some baywatch hair going and the guy next to me thanked me because he was "getting nauseas from the smell of stale sweat and tequila"
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