I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
I thought I broke my iPhone. I was almost as depressed as the day I broke my vibrator.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
Douche bag was crowd surfing, sack punched him. Crowd carried him away in a ball of agony. LIFE=COMPLETE.
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
You were sending me snapchats from a bathtub with your beer helmet on and your boobs out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
I only get hit on by people going through their midlife crisis. Yes, I did purposely write that gender neutral.
Shooting a bottle rocket from my penis was entirely justified. Twenty bucks is twenty buck no matter how you look at it
Alternately I could tell him western classical is just a series of events that had to happen for music to reach the point where Beyoncé was able to pen drunk in love, which is the pinnacle of humanity's artistic achievement thus far
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
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