hey babe. i'll pick you up in my mom's car. with my mom. she has nothing to do tonight.
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
Katie Perry lied, you can't just wake up and shake the glitter off your clothes.
he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
Yeah, you gave me a condom that I 100% coulda used, then an hour later you basically beat the shit out of me and physically took it from my pocket.
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
I figured you were on something. You're way too happy right now to be sober
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
Randomize
