i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
Your ass just called me, someone was yelling "awful waffle" and also, " I don't know who's hands are who's anymore"
SHE JUST SHOVED MY HAND DOWN HER PANTS AT THE BAR
Don't text me with that hand
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
Had to snap chat three different people to ask who left the bite mark on my thigh. All three said "Wasn't me". Now I can't wear a bathing suit to my mom's pool.
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
It's the never-ending clusterfuck that is my love life
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
Hey did you take a shower last night at like 4am?
"ummm...." (Thinking in my head) wet towel, soaking wet hair, clean pjs on backwards... "that would make more sense then what I thought happened..."
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
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