I'm exhausted and I have velveeta stuck in my teeth
Did you eat out Derrek's girlfriend again?
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
So uh... Did you mail me business cards that describe my profession as "tortured soul"?
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
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