i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
connan obrien reminds me of an asparagus spear
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
thought a girl was checking me out today. took me like 5 minutes to realize it was a mannequin
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
Randomize
