You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
You got pulled on stage by a stripper who wore ruffled ankle socks and did jumping jacks for her dance. Then you were put in a chokehold by a security guard that almost cried because you supposedly said "fuck you!" to him.
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
It's ok, I did squats with my bottle of wine before I opened it. That counts as the gym since I won't be getting there haha
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Randomize
