Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
Apparently last night drunk me put my phone in a cup of beer to make it "fun scented".
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
I've been drunk in my life. But I've never been "crying in 5 Guys at 1 in the afternoon" drunk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
Just woke up from a first date on the futon watching Arrested Development by myself, him cuddling another chick in his room. Simultaneously the best and worst one night stand in history.
Bonus: took me 2 hours to get home on the streetcar cause I spent my cab money on drinks for his friend last night.
at crossfit today a guy shit his pants while deadlifting 405 lbs. coach made fun of him then congratulated him on his new personal record.
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
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