Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
Woke up at 4:30am to my little brother shaking me. Apparently I fell asleep naked on my kitchen table waiting for the toaster to pop. 2 years of college completed and i still havent learned my drinking limit...
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
You called to teach me about fire safety, meowed a whole bunch, said "I hope you are not on fire" and hung up.
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
I took an uber home at 6am. Went to Santanas, apparently they don't take american express. So the uber driver bought my burrito. Success!
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?