I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
my boob sweat smells like rotting zombie flesh
is this your pickup line?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
I am trying to think of a way to tell him about thanksgiving and the following weekend in a way that makes me sound funny and exciting and not like an alcoholic
They knew I had a party because the refrigerator settings were different, but they don't notice that we installed a new toilet seat so it's okay.
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
she wants homewrecking advice
are you gonna teach her your ways?
obvs. i'm like her yoda.
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
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