Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
Man, only now that I'm single is it painfully obvious that I have zero booty calls in waiting. This could be a cold winter
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
My walk of shame wasn't complete until I projectile vomited clutching my truck bumper while he just smiled with that look of regret.
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
Randomize
