so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
Who replies to a drunk text at 6am that's like against the rules of being a designated drunk text receiver
i woke up with a kayak in my amazon shopping cart with 1 wrong digit on my credit card and the transaction wasn't going through.
I just need you to stay far enough away that I can't smell your cologne. I completely forget that I fucking hate you as soon as I smell it.
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
I have a few Facebook friends I only keep around for quality control purposes on Tinder
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
Randomize
