i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
We are both federal employees and Obama gave us a four-day weekend to lie in bed. Do you know how many orgasms that will be? I knew there was a reason I voted for this guy.
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
Randomize
