I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
If that was your dad, he is hot
this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
So I woke up in a strange bed with a note taped to my arm giving me directions back to my brothers apartment.
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
Well. No wine. And no real mixers. I'm using vodka and grape juice and calling it Slurrrlot. Happy Holidays bitch.
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
had a dream you helped me fill my shoes with yogurt. we were even like "why didn't we think of this before?!" like it was just so obvious
that sounds like something we'd do... we're onto something here
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
Randomize
