hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
You don't have asthma, your pregnant
she was pretty much dry humping my leg when her boyfriend walked in. he says "you should probably leave." all i could come up with was "YEAH, I KNOW!"
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
Dude you have to come get or im gonna nail this 64 y/o woman as repayment for buying me shots of jager
I don't judge her for getting booty calls at 2 in the morning, so she can't judge me for staying in friday nights and putting spray cheese on pringles.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
I fell asleep in the tanning bed, naked, for an hour and a half and I guess they couldn't wake me up so they called the fire department...and they came in while I was passed out naked...
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
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