The next morning she woke up and asked who I was and where she was.
so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
if another girl says "im usually cleaner down there" I'm just going to shoot myself
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
Met my future wife peeing in the men's room. I stood in for the missing door on the stall. We really hit it off talking about how her butt didn't even touch the seat from all the years of squat lifting in high school.
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
Nothing says girls night like wine cheese and pregnancy tests 😂
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize
