i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
Hey man sorry, can't talk. I'm already taking risks by ripping the bong on this conference call.
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
I think your high point was when the quesadilla was in your mouth and you were screaming "I can't chew!" and the Taco Bell guy just kinda stared at you like he wanted to strangle.
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
There's no way you didn't at least start out with a dick. I obviously know there isn't one now, but there is no way that you were born a girl
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
You kept telling everyone that you were as sober as a camel. I have yet to figure out what that means
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
Randomize