peeing in bathroom at penn station and the homeless man next to me is combing his beard with a fork...god I love new york
i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
Attn every girl I've slept with in the past 26 years of my life. One of you cunts gave me herpes. This is the 4th of 5 group MMS. That's right. It's in the 50s. There are two girls I don't have #s for. One was on a cruise and the other was a prostitute in Amsterdam. So which of you has herpes?
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
Randomize
