her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you want your laptop back?
are you giving me my laptop back, or cashing in on our break up sex?
both.
come over.
I dont think that yelling at the medic "Christmas is gone, fuck off santa" was the best idea when you couldnt feel your legs.
There was a selfie of you in the dark pointing at the camera with a duck face. You sent it to my 60 year old mother with the caption "you behave"
So which one of you fuckers changed my backgrounds while I was passed out to me holding a chicken like the statue of liberty?
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
I just matched the dude who's car I rear ended 2 years ago on tinder. I don't think he remembers.
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
Remind me later when I want to buy more drinks that there's a 20 in my bra
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
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