Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
She just texted me that she's horny, then started quoted random music, then telling me everything she regrets. I don't think there's enough tequila in the world for me to deal with her...
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
did you know the cops in wilco have clean up kits in their cars for when people puke in them? i found this out this morning. i'm finishing paperwork now. come get me plz?
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
SHE'S PREGNANT AS SHIT, AND I JUSR PEELED A CLEMENTINE TO CHASE SHOTS WITH!! COULD LIFE GET ANY BETTER!?
The stall at this bar had mirrors all around. I just looked at myself take a shit from like 3 different angles
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
Randomize