IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
Trying to put a fitted sheet on drunk is one of the boss levels of slutty adulthood.
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
I found a briefcase foll of fireworks in my old bedroom...that's an appropriate thing to bring to a wedding, right?
Look man if you're looking for a voice of reason, you're talking to the wrong woman.
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
Randomize
