She made me go with her to get a pregnancy test since she's missed a few birth control pills. She made me park in the "expectant mothers" spot at CVS and preceded to ask if it would be in the pest control section.
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
I told her I was going to sleep early last night. I probably should not have sent that snapchat of us playing beer pong.
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
Randomize
