Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
also, I heard you can donate your eggs for like $8gs....hellloooo mediterranean vacation. thank youuuu future babies!!!
Just had that moment when you realize the two drunk women shoving all their money down your clothes were your middle school teachers...
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
So now your dad has seen my tits. You could have told me he was coming by to help paint.
I didn't think you'd be painting the kitchen topless.
I couldn't find a shirt I was willing to ruin.
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
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