I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
A stripper just invited me to her daughter's birthday. Where did my life go wrong?
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
Just zoned back in to real life and found myself chanting "noodle eater noodle eater noodle eater" at my parrot as he devoured a single macaroni
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
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