i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just had a pleasant conversation with a mugger while he was taking off my shoes. Why can't I get along with people like this sober?
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
Just got a groupon for a segway rental: fireworks segway battle at my house. What say you?
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
drunk me always erases text conversations because she is a woman of mystery and does not like for me to know what's going on in her life
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
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