Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
you were exchanging tortilla chips with the guy at the next table, telling him your table was given the "big chips" because it was your 21st birthday
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
I come bearing gifts of whiskey and vagina
I watched you fall asleep, sitting up, eating a cinnamon roll. You proceeded to wake up...smile at your cinnamon roll, ask it how it got into your hand and then began eating it again. You asked me if you were ridiculous last night, define ridiculous.
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
Randomize
