he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
you were almost asleep and mumbling "your penis is on my cheek"
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
Nothing says "happy birthday" like a negative pregnancy test
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
I just talked comic books with a cop. We high-fived as he was running my name.
Proud of you.
We discussed the legality of being a vigilante. I won.
last night i was way too drunk and i was forcing people to let me tell them about mammals
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