i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
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I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
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I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
I'm going to need you to stop harassing my professor on Twitter when you're drunk.
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