i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
I want to apologize but I don't know how. Do I just say "sorry for OD'ing on your couch"? I think that just sounds weird.
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
I was changing in front of my window and my neighbor text me saying, "nice pubes."
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
Your skill with memes is vaguely frightening
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
Randomize
