yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
It's noon and i am somehow drinking by myself in a jazz tent in broad daylight.
so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
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