Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
no seriously, she's legit pissed i'm late to lunch because i was watching full house. there's obviously no future here.
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey dude. I've got a mini fridge in my closet now so we don't have to worry about getting drunk and falling down the stairs on our way to get more beer.
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
Being hungover in this office is the actual worst. Like they look at me and know I was wasted at 1 am, karaokeing Billy Idol at a gay bar.
Me: I shouldn't go to the airport bar it's too expensive and I don't need it. Dark me: SHOTS AT 7 AM
I wonder how horrible I look to customers. There's cuts all over my face and I can't talk.
What are the cuts from? Head-butting the bathroom light fixture?
Honestly that's best case scenario.
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
Randomize