3 of us had 22 margaritas. Hellllllo yellow cab. Goodbye morals.
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They all laughed at me when I bought that necklace from Life Alert. Who's laughing now?
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
You know shits really hit the fan when you start using public bathroom air freshener spray as perfume
what? where are you?
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