I saw a sign that said worlds largest frying pan next exit. Way to do your fucking part Iowa.
If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
I offered you a bag but you said "I gotta break in the new carpet" and you puked all over the floor
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
had a dream that i inhaled my pet bird and started choking. Then I tried smoking from a bong and suddenly I smoked myself inside out. this is what happens when I don't smoke weed. my brain can't function!
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
Randomize