I swear to god Optimus Prime and Megatron are fighting in my head right now.
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
Everyone knows that the fastest route to a corporate advancement is to take a shot in the mouth
nothing says happy birthday like half a tampon wrapped in someone else's hair on your shoulder.
29 Frat Parties That Got Way Too Out Of Control
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
15 Ridiculous Ways Broke People Managed to Make a Buck
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already