Midget sex pt 2 tonight
Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
You can duct tape yourself to me so we dont lose you and you dont have to celebrate your birthday alone
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
If I die, I leave all my liquor in my apartment to you. Be a drunk bitch at my funeral. I wouldn't want it any other way.
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
If I had a dollar for every time i woke up screaming for my pants i"d have enough money to buy all the beer I stole last night.
The guy at the Apple store said the warranty does NOT cover getting cum out of the keyboard. I can't believe I believed you.
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
Randomize
