how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
Listening to my boss get blown in the next room by a male bartender from the gay bar. And watching pawnstars. Tell me I'm not the best wingman ever.
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
You know it's nice having a girlfriend who will lotion your balls for you
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
Randomize
