Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
If i off myself, it'll be in a lobster costume in the hot tub with butter...
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
The thing is that despite the high paying career and the increased responsibility, my life hasn't changed that much. Only instead of blacking out on $2 wells at some dive I blackout on top shelf martinis in a suit. Oh and only on Fri & Sat nights. Being 30 doesn't suck as bad as everyone led me to believe.
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
You showed up at 4 a.m with two middle-aged men, a 200 dollar bottle of wine, three bottles of beer, no shoes on, and a half eaten red velvet cake.You are never drinking absinthe again.
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
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