He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
He played with my vagina like it was a turntable
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
Driving to get a preg test with my ex, wearing my unicorn hat
You are so not ready for motherhood
Oh god. It's like a broken faucet. My guts sound like a bilge pump clogged with golf balls and cake frosting.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
Got a snapchat from Megan last night showing you sobbing about a burrito on the floor with Dan in the background trying not to laugh his ass off
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
Randomize
